Delayed...

After another night of grant presentations last night, with a group of commissioners who are new and could best be described as affordable housing piranhas attacking the poor non-profit entities who were testing the waters, the Boss and I exchanged some raised eyebrows, and then later, after everyone was gone, we each questioned whether it was just us or was that possibly the most painfully excruciating 4 hours we just had to endure.

They were brutal, albeit civil, to the applicants, which led the Boss to confess, "That was the first time I remember apologizing to the applicants after the presentation. Ever."

Needless to say, I was feeling rather deflated when I left to go home.

Pppppppppffffffffffffffffffffffffffffttttttttttttttttttttttttt.....

That was the escape of the rest of my air when I got home and heard the msg from OT #2's office, saying, "We're sorry but we have to reschedule LMNOB's appointment that was set for tomorrow. We can get her in on Friday the 20th."

Except they can't; not at the time they offered, because I have a schedule conflict.

In the meantime, we've had a good week with her. She's on her game.

And it leads me to wonder if we're chasing the wrong squirrel?

I've always struggled with ambivalence...especially when given delays.

But is it ambivalence, or just plain confusion, just chaos and illusion clouding the scene?

I keep remembering the concern of our other family members who know LMNOB, the awkwardness with her peers, the things she's said recently, and then the troubling behaviors she has had over the course of her 6 year-old life...

But then, there's this mama bear in me who doesn't want anything to be wrong with my baby - and mama bear is prone to denial, especially when she can say, "Look! See, no problems this week -None!"