Friday, August 24, 2007

Sitting on the Verge...

So, my list the other day?
Schedule LMNOB's placement testing with the school...SOMETIME THIS WEEK
Schedule LMNOB's 504 plan meeting...
Cancel therapy session scheduled for tomorrow...TODAY (uhm, not my choice...that other person's - more on that later)
Reading assignment for Democracy and the Policy Process...
Create discussion post responses for said reading...BY FRIDAY

All done.

I called the counselor and left VM Tuesday night re: our cancellation for Wednesday. She called me Wednesday at work and left me a VM lecturing me on how short of notice it was (23.5 hours notice - Not too shabby in the mental health profession, imho.), how it was a prime spot (evening), etc., etc. I called her back - got VM, again (surprise!) and told her I was sorry for the lack of advance notice, it wasn't my idea, and yet I got stuck with making the call. The deal is this: Charlie Brown wants to get more involved with the campus ministry at church. We were inaugural members 10 years ago. Because we've been fighting like cats and dogs lately, and because one of my beefs is his profession of faith but a lack of walk to go with his talk, I jumped on this as an opprotunity for change. That was before Wednesday night. After Wednesday night, I feel like my good faith in the gesture has been somewhat wasted. But, ah, you know they say Rome wasn't built in a day, so maybe it needs some time? Anyways, no word from the counselor on Thursday, and I was out of the office today - so who knows where that stands - I did convey that we'd like to reschedule.

All I know is, if this therapy gig gets dropped, my hope for our marriage is dropping off too. As such I find myself sitting on the verge of something. What, I'm not quite sure.

LMNOB and I had our last big hurrah before school starts up again today. And I'm tired. But it was a good day. We...........:big breath in:....because the next 4.5 paragraphs are supposed to be me rattling off our day in one big statement since it was all backtoback........went to breakfast at Village Inn, ran into Target for a lunch box and thermos for next week, got to our joint hair appointment in time, both got trimmed up, and then I learned that LMNOB's haircut with my pricey stylist (that I thought would be a splurge, but well worth the mommy and me sense of indulgement) was less than what I've been paying at the discount cutters' places! OMGosh!! No more Samtastic Fan's or Not-so-great Clips, that's for sure. Oh, but the adult prices? Still high for this penny pincher. Still worth every damn penny I have to begrdugingly part with.

Went to Kohl's to finish school clothes shopping. Shopping is so much different with her now, and especially one on one. She's content to browse and hunt for the perfect! outfit! Though, I might say that she has no value for the Benjamins yet. Must combine that to her newfound thrill of the retail/fashion hunt. Then to another store to pick up muffin tins for the Great Muffin Project. The GMP was my idea to make whole wheat, fat-free vanilla yogurt in lieu of butter, tasty little muffins (chocolate zucchini and orange cranberry), to freeze and throw into LMNOB's lunches each school day as a means to avoid the twinkie induced malnutrition of my perfect little sweetheart. Yeah, it was a little Martha Stewart of an idea for me, but hey, sometimes that part of my personality sneaks out and makes a showing. Mostly though, she is repressed. Home to do lunch and the actual recipe making for the GMP.

Then it was time for OT with BT the OT, at which appointment the OT from Local Neighborhood School was going to join us for a planning session re: school next week. That went well. GREAT, even. I think it was because LMNOB gave the gift of a chocolate muffin that carried no guilt to all parties involved? Chocolate makes everything better. Especially when there's no guilt attached - C'mon, whole wheat, zucchini, AND non-fat yogurt in lieu of butter? Fiber, no fat, and uhm, yum. No, I really am not a crunchy granola. Nor am I a domestic freakazoid like our girl Martha. Really, it has more to do with some dietary monitoring BT the OT has started me on for LMNOB. LNS OT has already talked to LMNOB's teacher and Ms. M is on board with it all. Then, it was time for the ice cream social/meet your teacher and classmates/great school supply drop off (to avoid irreparable back damage from overloaded backpacks on Monday) at Local Neighborhood School. LMNOB and I saw her babyhood friend from church there (she attended LNS last year also), and later the little girlfriend A who now lives across the street and is also transferring to LNS this year after a year somewhere else last year. Problem was, A and babyhood friend are in the same class, and it is not LMNOB's class. This was cause for much bravadoed distress where LMNOB was crying without sound and it broke. my. heart.

All of a sudden the great OT consult which had such promising overtures to it seemed to not encompass the enormity of this transition for LMNOB. As we went into the classroom and LMNOB met Ms. M, it got worse. Sidenote: Ms. M is recently recovering from cancer, and the disparity between her online pic at the school website and her post-chemo, bandana wearing self was quite astonishing. She told another parent though that the cancer is gone. Yay! LMNOB was painfully shy with the classmates, who all knew each other from last year. Ex.cept. For. Her. I was so busy trying to calm her that I didn't get a chance to meet the other parents in her room. LMNOB didn't really come around until as we were leaving, the Girl Scouts booth caught her eye. "MOM!! I want to do that!" "Well LMNOB, you're gonna have to learn to talk to the kids in Girl Scouts too, and not be so shy." "Oh but mommy, I WILL! I will just have to get used to it Mom. It takes time." Yes, dear, it does. You are so wise for your age.

LMNOB and I on the verge of a humongoid transition. One that might go a bit bumpy. I fully expect the return of the difficult mornings.

And at that, we drove home. Said gooodbye to Charlie Brown and Punkinhead - who are camping in the backcountry tonight. And commenced our girls night by inviting my friend, the lovely SW (who loves shoes so much I might just call her DSW from here on out), to come on over, ate dinner at Taco Del Mar, and came home to watch countless DVR'd episodes of What Not to Wear, while we manicured and pedicured to our hearts' content.

Then DSW left and I put on a DVD for LMNOB which only got her attention for .5 minutes before the snoring started. I posted discussion responses for school as indicated above.

Now? I'm wiped. Good night. I anticipate dreams of falling off the verge.

No comments:

Post a Comment