Thursday, October 4, 2007

Sick of this CRAP!

That is of the watery, incognito-then-recurring variety found here at Casa del Meyer.

Also? I am very disturbed right now. The language is much harder than my normal PG 13. You sailors can laugh all you want, but this is hard core for me, and possibly for many of my readers. That said - take cover, F bombs are present in this post.

I alluded to our malaise in yesterday's post, but there's a couple of reasons why I think it fits for us:

Scenario 1:
Labor Day, September 3: Pancake Breakfast with church at an elderly couple's rural farm. Said farm has a wonderland for thrill seekers, including a rip cord across a canal, rope swings and a giant platform "hop on" swing. My kids of course, fully submerged themselves in the canal water after repeated stints with the rope swing.

Crypto is a waterborne parasite...


Scenario 2:
2, maybe 3 weeks ago...daycare provider's 2 y/o son had diarrhea that would. not. GO. AWAY.

Exposure...prior to crypto warning and subsequent ritual cleaning...

Plus, toddler hygiene - need I say more?


Nevertheless, the end result is that Casa del Meyer has had the following GI timeline:

September 18th - I hosted a direct sales party at home, and stayed home to clean and prep. Charlie Brown called me - mortified - from work. Could I please bring him a change of underwear? He'd apparently shat himself.

18th - 23rd really vague and general "Mommy, my tummy hurtses" statements from Punkinhead and LMNOB.

September 24th: Punkinhead throws up. Charlie Brown not well. They stay home.

September 25th: all clear - daycare, school and work we go.

September 26th: LMNOB throws up. All. DAY. Long. I stay home with her.

September 27th: LMNOB has had diarrhea - I stay home again.

September 28th: We're all good. I go to work, for a training in Denver. Upon returning to the office at 3:00pm, there is a msg from daycare: Punkinhead has had diarrhea all day. Pick him up.

September 29th: Kids ok. Charlie Brown is vomitting and diarrhea-ing.

September 30th: Kids still ok. I am vomitting and diarrhea-ing. Charlie Brown is slowing down on the sick.

Monday, Oct. 1: I stay home - kids go to school and daycare. Daycare calls at 3:00 - Punkinhead had diarrhea explosion during nap. I pick him up. That evening, daycare provider calls with crypto information.

Tuesday, Oct 2: Punkinhead is solid. We all go to school, daycare, work. At 4:15 e-mail from LMNOB's teacher pops on screen, saying "LMNOB had an accident at school today. She's ok, got change of clothes from the nurse, and we talked - she said her tummy was not feeling well."
Pick kids up at daycare - tell daycare provider - she tells me she can't take them until they've been "solid" for at least 24 hrs. Which is fine, except, they have gone 24hrs without diarrhea multiple times, and yet here we still are. I, being the public awareness minded person I am, sent LMNOB's teacher and principle the health alert, explaining that LMNOB would be home tomorrow.

Weds. Oct 3: I stay home with kids (note this is the 4th day home from work). I bought new shower curtain and bath accessories for the kids, totally sanitized every surface imaginable with peroxide, called the health dept - who told me to call the kids' pediatrician and get them tested.

Call the pediatrician - he's not there but one of his associates is - ok, that'll work.

We go in. Tell the nurse, no diarrhea from Punkinhead today, some from LMNOB.

Wait for MD.

She comes in - makes me repeat, tells me the standard "GI bugs transmit fecal-orally, they spread back and forth a lot in daycare due to poor hygiene, yada yada, oh, hey are ya Rockies fans? They're winning! Bye-bye. Kids, make sure you get a sticker on the way out."

"Whoah - wait," I interrupt, pointing to my Larimer County Health Dept. handout, "Don't you need to test them for this outbreak thing?"

"Nah, we don't do that."

"Ooooooooookay." I am not impressed. Especially given our last interaction with this clinic.

"Well," she asked, now feeling acquiescent...sort of? "Do you need anything - like a note, or something?"

:LOUD sigh:

"Uhm, yeah - I mean since the diarrhea has been recurrent, my daycare provider is leary of taking them back in. And, you know, I surely don't want to be spreading something in the absence of diarrhea and then having it pop back up again." Ya know, because I am a somewhat responsible member of this community and all, and have a CONSCIENCE about communicable health.

She wrote them notes to get back into daycare/school tomorrow. EVEN THOUGH I'D TOLD HER LMNOB HAD HAD DIARRHEA NOT 3 HOURS EARLIER!

I left - pissed that I would have to pay upwards of $100 for 10 minutes of a less than half-assed (quarter-assed?) pass at feigning interest in my children's health. I'm sorry ya'll the F bomb is about to be utilized. FUCK if that isn't the reason we are in a damned health CARE crisis in this nation, is crap like this! And I have insurance!

LMNOB proceeded to have more diarrhea in the afternoon.

I continued cleaning. Cooked the best meal we've had in two weeks since this shit began, and all seemed to be on the up.

Thursday, Oct. 4: I'm up, getting myself and LMNOB ready, when Punkinhead wails frantically from the bathroom, "Mama, I need help wiping!"

Go in and assess. The toilet bowl is full of brown water. Again.

Now..."mother cow" is my euphemistic attempt to avoid motherfucker - but it ALL came out, "Mother fuckin' cow! Dammit."

Punkinhead: "Mama, I'm swowwy!"

"Oh honey, no, it's not you - you can't control it. It's ok. I just REALLY want you to get better."

Wipe up the toilet bowl with peroxide. Wash hands for a period of time only an obsessive compulsive would approve of.

Get LMNOB off to school. Call the school, say she's on her way. Explain yesterday's visit. Explain that we are again dealing with diarrhea in my son, and that we will keep the school apprised as to what we're told.

Call the pediatrician's office.

"Clinic Name, this is Darlene."

"Hi Darlene, this is Heather Meyer, my kids were in yesterday to see Dr. OnlyWomanInThePractice."


"Well, Darlene, Dr. OnlyWomanInThePractice virtually told me I was chasing a GI bug, that there was no need to test for crypto, and sent me on my way. And now, my son has just had diarrhea AGAIN, which makes for the 10th day, and this is not normal and I would really like to talk to someone about actually testing for crypto. Dr. PediatricianThatWe’veHadFOR.EV.ER, perhaps?

"Well, Dr. PediatricianThatWe’veHadFOR.EV.ER is not in yet, can I put you through to his PA's line?"


Get Voicemail. Leave long message, explaining that I am tired of being dismissed, I am looking into switching providers, and that I really would like to have a call returned about the feasibility of this crypto test.

That was two hours ago.

I am sick of this crap - nah, I'll call it like it is. I am sick of this SHIT, on more than one level.


  1. Oh yuck. This is why being a mom terrifies me! I hope you are all feeling better very soon! And call the doctor back again! Squeaky wheel, and all that....

  2. Wow, I hope things solidify soon.

    I shouldn't have laughed about Charlie Browm shatting himself, but I did.